I absolutely love, love, love reading the book of Proverbs!
The book of Proverbs is filled with wisdom for all occasions in life, and the final chapter gives each of us a glimpse of a rare woman, indeed.
Let’s call her the Proverbs 31 Woman.
The Proverbs 31 Woman
There have been thousands of books written that detail the lifestyle of this Proverbs 31 Woman. She is a godly woman of industry, elegance, purity, entrepreneurial endeavor, and daily diligence. She is definitely someone who ought to be a role model for all women everywhere.
But what about us men? Is there anything that men can learn from this final chapter of Proverbs? Is this a chapter of God’s Word that is reserved for the woman, solely, or can both sexes find applicable truth in its refreshing waters? Indeed, the answer is yes. Much more “yes” than you could ever imagine!
I have been teaching from the book of Proverbs for a number of months now on Wednesday evenings at my church. It has been a rich study for me personally. But I must confess that I’ve gotten more out the study than I would have ever thought possible.
You see, the Proverbs 31 Woman–and the chapter as a whole–has completely transformed my thinking. It has reshaped (or solidified) my outlook on relationships, business, family, career, entrepreneurship, gender roles, and the idea of honoring those who deserve honor.
The Man Behind the Proverbs 31 Woman
Just so you know, I plan to write dozens of articles in the near future about this specific chapter. There is so much truth and applicable wisdom in this final chapter that I would feel like I hid something dramatically important from you if I didn’t. So thanks in advance for coming along this ride as we (re)discover the Proverbs 31 Woman and, more specifically, the “man” of this chapter.
Most people familiar with this chapter know about the Proverbs 31 Woman, but most people know next to nothing about the man. You see, the content of the chapter was written by a mother to her son, King Lemuel, who most scholars agree was King Solomon himself. And if it was King Solomon who the mother was writing to, then the mother was Bathsheba, the wife of King David.
Poem #1 of Proverbs 31
Proverbs 31 is, essentially, two poems. The first poem is found in verses 1-9. The second poem is found in verses 10-31.
Most people are familiar with the second poem because it is the one which outlines the Proverbs 31 Woman. These 22 verses are literarily arranged with each of the 22 verses beginning with the 22 letters of the Hebrew alphabet in consecutive order. The verses detail for us a wealthy woman who would be a godly wife for someone who would be king.
But there’s a problem here. Context is everything, and you will miss so much about the second poem if you know little about the first.
Proverbs 31 is for men, not necessarily women. It is the man’s responsible to find this rare woman as she is a jewel among the common stones of worldly females. In fact, Proverbs 31 is a chapter that was to be memorized by Jewish men.
Yes, to be memorized by Jewish men!
What’s Wrong with the Proverbs 31 Woman?
The Proverbs 31 Woman is fictitious. She’s not a “real” person as no name is given for her. The poem offers examples of what a godly woman looks like, based upon her character, activities, and lifestyle.
But she’s also a superhero. Yes, she’s the biblical definition of a holy Superwoman, if you will. There are no sins, faults, or character flaws with this woman. She’s… perfect! There is no woman on planet Earth who can compete with her. And the reason is because she is fiction.
The Proverbs 31 Woman is a target. Her life and character are the “goal” to be pursued.
So don’t fret if you feel inadequate by her perfection. (In fact, I can’t think of a man who would feel comfortable being married to her.) She’s just too good, too perfect, too hard to live with. But I also think that’s the point. Ultimately, the Proverbs 31 Woman lives exactly like Jesus would if he were a woman.
Did you catch that?
She’s perfect. She lives just like Jesus would. Therefore, Jesus is to remain your goal, your target, your hope. You are being conformed into the image of Jesus Christ, not into the image of the Proverbs 31 Woman.
Please, don’t ever forget this truth!
What Else Can We Learn from Proverbs 31?
As I mentioned above, I will be writing many more articles about the content of Proverbs 31. But I want to leave you with this one nugget of truth as we begin to close.
You see, I believe that the Proverbs 31 Woman is someone who EVERY MAN should strive to be like as well!
Yes, I want to live more like the Proverbs 31 Woman. I want to possess her diligence, her wisdom, her strength, her entrepreneurial fire, her goals and dreams and family. I want to be just like the Proverbs 31 Woman when I grow up.
One of the things I find so very fascinating is that you can change the feminine pronouns (etc.) into masculine pronouns and nothing really changes. How the Proverbs 31 Woman lives her life, essentially, is how every man ought to live his.
As an example, below you will find the verses of Proverbs 31:10-31. However, what I’ve done is exchanged the feminine words with their masculine equivalent, and vice versa.
In the comments section below, let me know what you think about this “role reversal” as it compares with today’s biblical manhood.
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10 An excellent husband, who can find? For his worth is far above jewels.
11 The heart of his wife trusts in him, and she will have no lack of gain.
12 He does her good and not evil all the days of his life.
13 He looks for wool and flax and works with his hands in delight.
14 He is like merchant ships; he brings his food from afar.
15 He rises also while it is still night and gives food to his household and portions to his male servants.
16 He considers a field and buys it; from his earnings he plants a vineyard.
17 He girds himself with strength and makes his arms strong.
18 He senses that his gain is good; his lamp does not go out at night.
19 He stretches out his hands to the distaff, and his hands grasp the spindle.
20 He extends his hand to the poor, and he stretches out his hands to the needy.
21 He is not afraid of the snow for his household, for all his household are clothed with scarlet.
22 He makes coverings for himself; his clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 His wife is known in the gates, when she sits among the elders of the land.
24 He makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies belts to the tradesmen.
25 Strength and dignity are his clothing, and he smiles at the future.
26 He opens his mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on his tongue.
27 He looks well to the ways of his household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 His children rise up and bless him; his wife also, and she praises him, saying:
29 “Many sons have done nobly, but you excel them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a man who fears the Lord, he shall be praised.
31 Give him the product of his hands, and let his works praise him in the gates.
(Original text taken from the NASB)
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QUESTION: In the comments section below, tell me what you think about the Proverbs 31 Woman and, more specifically, the Man behind this amazing Woman?
Original image found at: Imperfect Homemaker
I have been saved 9 years now, and I am so grateful the Lord saved me. When I was saved the Lord sent mentors to me (a man and his wife ) to be “the light” in my life to guide me to Him. They were Reverands. The man tought the word to me (a saved Jew) and she tought me to be a Proverb 31 woman. It was not easy for them trust me, I was not very pliable at that time, but 5 years of teaching and loving me made me into a Proverb 31 woman. She tought me love, that’s what it is all about. She has since passed away and her head stone says, Proverb 31 Woman.
I have heard men judge their wives according to Proverbs 31. It’s refreshing to hear a man hold up the same standards described there for men. Men and women are both expected to be conformed to the image of Christ. We are co-heirs. The perspective depends on who’s working the spotlight. Well done! You chose to look at yourself.
Thanks for those kind words!